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Friday, March 18, 2011

White Sale

So I think I might be White.

You know, I wasn't sure about it whenever I read, "The Things White People Like," because I did like SOME of those things, but I also hated a lot of the others. I felt like I liked as many of the things on that list that anyone would like, regardless of race.

Alright, so I probably like a lot more of those things that I'm willing to admit, but the point is that not only am I currently going through a hipster-crisis, but I'm currently going through a white person-crisis. My suspicions were confirmed today as I recounted, in my head, my activities for the day:

1. After I showered this morning and put on a plaid camp-shirt, matching tank top and flats, I opened the doors and windows to my house and said, "Wow, I really should be doing something outside!"
2. I went to Subway and ordered a sandwich with the flatbread because I shouldn't be eating that bread that's so full of carbs (this actually went through my head).
3. I went to Starbucks to get an Iced Americano and used the internet...and then I complained about both of these things on Facebook.
4. I drove my Subaru Outback to the Antique shop and bought a vintage settee for more than it was probably worth because it was JUST LIKE the one my grandmother had, and it would go nicely on my front porch, surrounded by my summer garden of herbs and flowers.
5. I promptly went to Home Depot and bought Aqua paint for this settee because it was a really cute color that would really set-off that lime green Buddha that is hanging out on my front porch already. I scrubbed the settee down and thought to myself, "What a nice weekend project!"

And here we are.

The amount of self-loathing that is rising up in my gullet is second only to the self-realization that I really like all of these activities.

I wonder if Dustin knew he was marrying a white chick.  Best Blogger Tips

3 comments:

  1. Were you feigning disdain for CJ just to throw me off of this interesting piece of news?

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  2. You're going to have to watch it or he'll be into #66.

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  3. Jessica, Jessica, Jessica... I really don't know what to say. I'll chalk it up to desperate loneliness, and forgive you for your transgressions against our unspoken marital vows.

    Numbers 85 (T-shirts), 75 (Threatening to move to Canada) and 1 (Coffee) are probably the only selections that I have more than a passing interest in. Although I suppose I could get behind 71, if you took out the word "white."

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